The Dumpmonkey is a 16" plush monkey.
The certificates are made from the worlds
finest paper. Not much to it really.
(Click
to Enlarge)
Dump U Message reads: "This certificate is in
recognition that <name> has been officially relieved of the duty of
significant other on this date, <day and date>"
Break U Message reads: "This certificate is in recognition
that <name> has acknowledged the fact that they like their
significant other but will be taking a week off from them in order to enjoy
Spring Break! See you in a week, <day and date>"
Screw the FCC Message reads: "This certificate is in
recognition that <name> is
officially tired of the FCC, their vague rules and their mission to take
away Howard Stern’s first amendment rights! The FCC Blows!, <day and
date>"
Going Home Message reads: "This certificate is in
recognition that <name> is heading home for summer break and
hopes they can pick things up where they left off next semester. I like
you, but the distance thing would suck. <day and date>"
One Night Stand U Message reads: "This certificate is in
recognition that <name> very much enjoyed the evening but is in
no way interested in a relationship with you. Perhaps a future booty call
is in order, but nothing more. Thanks for the fun. <day and date>"
3 Way U Message reads: "This certificate is in recognition
that <name> is interested in you (and one of your friends) but
doesn’t quite know how to ask about a potential threesome. What do you
say? <day and date>"
